While sex can be a source of pleasure and an important cornerstone in a relationship, for many men it can be a source of frustration and anxiety. While men can come in 5-10 minutes and be more than satisfied, most women need a longer time period to reach the same level of stimulation and release. As a result, a lot of men want sex to last longer, both so they can satisfy their ladies and get more out of sex themselves. Unfortunately, premature ejaculation, whether it’s a medical problem or a psychological one, can lead to a whole slew of insecurities which can turn a pleasurable activity into a challenging one. This can eventually wear down on a relationship and also erode a man’s self-confidence.
If you’ve been trying to figure out how to last longer in bed, you probably have found yourself in a deluge of advertisements for erectile dysfunction pills, most of which are supposed to be able to increase your stamina, even if you don’t actually suffer from ED. While these pills have helped many men, they are also known for their adverse side effects, and many men prefer to find a more natural approach to solving their problems. After all, a pill may eventually indirectly allow you to feel more confident about your sex life, but taking a direct approach can lead to a more satisfying result. Here are some suggestions for natural ways to last longer in bed.
Practice, Practice, Practice
Masturbation is a great way to learn how to last longer in bed. When you masturbate, you’re probably trying to get to the finish line as quickly as you can, right? Try taking a different outlook on masturbation and establishing different goals. Instead of trying to reach climax right away, focus on masturbating for a longer time. Learn how to let up on the stimulation a bit when you get close, and also try fantasizing about foreplay instead of having an orgasm. Our bodies often follow right behind what our minds are doing, so if you masturbate thinking about coming, you’ll probably come right away. If instead you focus on foreplay, you are more likely to last longer. There’s a payoff here too—oftentimes the longer you build up arousal, the harder you’ll come when you finally reach your climax.
Masturbate Before Sex
If you masturbate for a while about an hour before you have sex, you can reduce your sex drive a little bit. This may sound like a contradictory idea, but if you’re used to premature ejaculation, it can help to get some of that arousal out of your system in advance. Don’t worry, it’ll build back up again.
If you think you’re going to ejaculate early during sex, one way you can disrupt that possibility is by stopping what you’re doing for a moment and squeezing the area just below the head of your penis. This puts pressure on your urethra and forces blood out of the penis. The result is that you’re less likely to ejaculate.
Kegel exercises are a great way to learn how to control your ejaculation. These exercises help you train the Pubococcygeus muscle (the “PC muscle” for short). You can locate this muscle by trying to stop the flow of urine while you’re going to the bathroom. Once you’ve managed this, you’ll know where they are and you’ll be able to do the same thing when you aren’t urinating. The great thing about Kegel exercises is that you can work on training this muscle anytime, anywhere, no matter what you’re doing! No one will know you’re doing anything at all. You can work on improving your sexual stamina while you’re in the car, at the office, watching television, or doing whatever.
Change Positions and Techniques
The most natural choices for sexual positions for men are usually the ones which allow them to thrust the hardest and deepest, but these are also the positions which are going to lead to early ejaculation. Try different sexual positions and techniques. Pressing and grinding instead of thrusting can help you to last longer and your lady will probably enjoy it too. Letting your lady get on top can also relieve some of the pressure on the head of the penis, which may let you last longer. Varying your sexual positions and techniques can make sex more interesting and fun.
Try Round Two
If you ejaculate early, instead of giving up, why not keep going? Don’t worry about yourself—just work on getting your lady off instead. You may think you can only have one orgasm before you need a long break, but you may find yourself getting aroused again. Many men are surprised to discover that they can last longer on a second go around.
Stop Thinking About It
Thinking about having an orgasm is likely to lead you there faster than thinking about other aspects of sex. This is true whether you’re masturbating or having sex. You can last longer by focusing on other things. A lot of guys distract themselves by thinking of random, unrelated things, but you don’t have to kill the mood. Try thinking about what you’re actually doing instead of where it’s leading. You may be more interested in having an orgasm than anything else, but it’s causing you anxiety, and you’re having fun, right? Focus on the rest of the sexual experience and enjoy it as a whole and you’ll most likely last longer.
Learning to control your ejaculation time can be an intimidating prospect at first, but the most important thing to realize is that you can get better at it. Whether you actually suffer from premature ejaculation or you just want to learn to last longer in bed, you should never succumb to the idea that you’re helpless to do better. A lack of confidence is probably the main source of your problems—work on that by trying out some of these techniques, and you’re sure to start seeing improvement.
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