Can Oral Sex Ever Be As Fun As Intercourse?

While oral sex is one of the most common sexual activities out there, there are lots of people who haven’t tried it.  There are many reasons that people don’t try out oral sex.  Maybe you were raised in an environment where you were taught that oral sex is shameful, or maybe you are just ashamed because you don’t think you know how to do it well (don’t worry; most people have a bit of a learning curve when it comes to performing oral sex).  One common reason though that a lot of people don’t try oral sex is simply that they are already hooked on sexual intercourse, and have a hard time imagining that oral sex could ever be as fun.  This is especially common with guys, in part because it’s what our culture teaches us.

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The Goal of Sex

For lots of people, the goal of sex is to have an orgasm.  It’s natural to think this way; after all, having an orgasm feels great.  But so do all the sexual experiences along the way, and it’s easy to cut the experience short if you race to the end goal.  Since the fastest way to have an orgasm for a lot of guys is intercourse, it’s common to think of all other sexual activities as a means to an end as well.  If you’ve thought about oral sex, there’s a pretty good chance you’ve considered it as a type of foreplay, as opposed to an activity in its own right.  Lots of people use oral sex for foreplay; there’s nothing wrong with that.  Maybe that’s how oral sex will fit into your sex life.  But you might find that you enjoy it just as much as intercourse—or more.  Everyone is different.

You Never Know Unless You Try

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If you’ve never felt an overwhelming drive to try oral sex, and you’re merely curious about it (or maybe it’s your partner who is interested), then you may think, “Well, if it was really something which is going to appeal to me, wouldn’t I be interested in it?”  While there are a lot of things you can determine about your sexuality before you try them (like your sexual orientation), it’s a fact that many people don’t get to know themselves fully as sexual beings until they try out more activities.  Obviously if the idea of oral sex repulses you, there’s no reason you should pursue it.  But if you’re open to the idea and curious, then you will never know if you enjoy it until you give it a try.

If your partner is really excited by the idea of oral sex, you’ll definitely make her happier if you give it a try, and that can pay off in a lot of ways!  Most guys enjoy getting blowjobs and wish they could get more; going down on your partner is a great way to get her to return the favor.  You may enjoy both performing and receiving.  The sensations which you feel during oral sex, whether you’re giving or receiving, are unique.  Even the orgasms you experience may feel distinctive since the stimulation involved is different.

Lots of people who have only a passing interest in oral sex find out that they enjoy it a lot once they actually give it a try—sometimes as much or more than intercourse.  Oral sex can help you to be more intimate with your partner.  Many people find it more intimate than intercourse, which can cause self conscious people to feel nervous about trying it for the first time.  This is especially the case with people who have a poor self image.

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How to Get Started

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How do you get started with oral sex if you’re totally new to it?  Well, first off, read this article to learn more about how to go down on your partner.   You also may want to read this article on getting more blowjobs.  You’ll probably feel more comfortable about trying oral sex for the first time after you’ve done a bit of reading.

If your partner is the one who has approached you about oral sex, it should be relatively easy for you to actually get started, since you already know she’s enthusiastic about it.  If you’re the one who is curious about oral sex and you’ve never talked about it before, you’ll need to find a way to approach your partner about it.  Be positive—make sure she knows that you’re enjoying the sex you are having, but that you think that your sex life would be more intimate and rewarding if you tried something new.  Some people do have hang-ups about oral sex, so be prepared for that.  Your partner may be as enthusiastic as you are though, or even more so.  You don’t know until you ask.

Oral sex is not the easiest sex skill in the world to master.  It takes some getting used to.  That’s true for both men and women.  So if you are worried about being pretty bad at it the first time, try not to sweat it.  Odds are you are not going to be an oral sex god right from the start.  And your partner may be just as rubbish as you are.  And that’s okay, if you’re patient and willing to give it a few more tries.  Most people get a lot better at oral sex with practice and a little direction from their partners.

Once you get used to having oral sex, you’ll have a better idea of whether you enjoy it or not.  Not everybody loves oral sex, but lots of people do, men and women both.  Try to look at those awkward starting stages as something fun and not as something stressful.  It’s just one more way to get to know your partner sexually, and a sense of humor can go a long way toward alleviating any tension.  Have fun, give it some time, keep an open mind, and you may find out that you enjoy oral sex just as much as you enjoy intercourse!

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